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bill-holmes: “ how the fuck did we get from there to where we are today ” Aces. Just aces. Yes, I’ll be adding this to Herstory. 
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Scoop.it!
Since Saturday, when porn actress and writer Stoya tweeted that she was raped by porn hero James Deen, four more adult film performers have come out agains Via Gracie Passette
Deanna Dahlsad's insight:
@Gracie Passette's comments: Cauterucci's article gives the most balanced view of the whole James Deen rape story ~ including the debacles facing women in porn and sex work. While the adult industry has a much faster (and positive) response to its stars who rape and abuse than Hollywood and mainstream media do, there are always the following issues of whether or not it is rape if a person is paid or likes rough sex. Cauterucci: "There is nothing wrong or rape-like about enjoying rough sex and being good at it. There is nothing wrong or suspicious about acting out a consensual rape fantasy. But, as in offscreen/noncommercial sex, the entire validity of porn as an industry hinges on consent. Perversely, that may be one reason why a porn actress might feel compelled to stay silent about these kinds of violations: Women who act in adult films are often portrayed as victims with little agency or know-how, who must resort to a demeaning and dangerous career because they have no other options. Stories like the ones Fires, Lux, Rayne, and Peters tell—important as they are—don’t exactly contradict that myth. But neither porn nor rough sex subjected these women to sexual assault, and they didn’t turn James Deen into a rapist. The allegations against Deen are full of references to ways porn actresses control their own careers: through lists of acts they won’t perform, lists of people they won’t perform with, and contracts that specify exactly what will happen in a scene. Deviating from the agreed-upon variety, timing, and manner of sex is just as wrong as any other kind of assault. The women who’ve told their horrifying stories about Deen know that. Deen and the bystanders who looked on and laughed did, too." Click links for more info on rape & rape fantasies ~ including issues in porn & sex work.
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Woman reports FB abuse to man's employer. Man gets fired. Internet deluges woman with death and rape threats. https://t.co/7I26A68EgH Via End Misogyny
Deanna Dahlsad's insight:
*sigh*
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If you've ever wanted to tell a street harasser to stick it where the sun don't shine, but couldn't find the right words -- don't worry, these mamas got you covered. Via bobbygw
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A new study from the Pew Research Center provides shocking hard data on internet harassment. Via bobbygw
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The many stereotypes of black women are used to justify violence and aggression against them. Because black women are mythologized as gold-digging, angry, physically strong, provocative shrews some black men assume (and this is something that having a mama, a auntie, a grandmother who raised you, or your own damn daughters doesn’t change) that if/when black women are hit, they asked for (or deserved) it. At the end of the day many men empathize with other men and instead of vilifying any act of violence, physical or otherwise, against anyone, especially a woman, they attempt to justify it. They put themselves in the shoes of the aggressor, but not the victim, and see themselves as blameless and reactionary, rather than violent and misogynistic.
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by Libby Anne cross posted from her blog Love, Joy Feminism
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I stood there seething, my heart pounding, frustrated and embarrassed that I couldn’t get him to stop or go away.
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“When we rape we feel free”, a young soldier in the Congolese Army confesses with astonishing candour. In a country where it’s estimated that 48 women are raped every hour, his actions have become virtually the norm, and not the exception. The Democratic Republic of Congo has born the brunt of vicious wars and fighting almost continuously since 1996, concentrated in the east of the country. One of the reasons the women repeat to anyone who bothers to ask them is: “where there’s fighting there’s rape”.
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"We are witnessing a very slow and painful cultural shift," explains Anita Sarkeesian, the brains behind "Feminist Frequency."
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TRIGGER WARNING. THIS ARTICLE CONTAINS TEXT AND IMAGES THAT MAY BE HARMFUL TO SURVIVORS. A friend recently sent me a link to a TEDx video that features Leslie Morgan Steiner. Steiner is a Harvard graduate, former editor of Seventeen magazine, and a successful businesswoman. She is also a domestic violence survivor. The author of Crazy Love, Steiner busts… Via TheHumanMirror, Deanna Dahlsad
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Let's face it: When we're newly coupled up, we tend to look at our partner -- and the budding relationship itself -- through a pair of proverbial rose-colored glasses.
Deanna Dahlsad's insight:
See also: 13 Signs You’re In A Toxic Relationship
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Fathers Rights.Karen Anderson suspected that something strange was going on between her ex-husband, Rex Anderson, and their 15-year-old daughter. Prior to the couple's separation in 1998, the girl would sometimes... Via Claudine Dombrowski, Deanna Dahlsad
Scott Gibboney's curator insight,
March 1, 2014 9:44 AM
Have you ever noticed that county court houses are becoming wealthy at the expense of the most innocent. Check out what happened in Pennsylvania with a caper well known as " Kids For Cash " and I doubt much will change as the truth will most likely be drowned out by well paid lawyer ...may God have mercy.
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One of the cooler experiences I've had in recent memory was meeting Elsie Nanugaq Tommy, a spry 104-year-old who started a secret women's shelter decades ago out of her home in Newtok, Alaska. She's a bundle of smiles and optimism -- and her legacy of helpfulness already has been passed down to her granddaughter, Denise Tommy, who is executive director of the Tundra Women's Coalition in Bethel, Alaska, which shelters women and fights violence with educational programs.
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Isn't this a creepy, abusive-stalkery-type valentine? It takes the idea of a prisoner of your love to a whole new (low) level -- complete with gun! You're the one I've been looking for, My chase is...
Deanna Dahlsad's insight:
See this mechanical card in action!
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Here's Barbie as you've never seen her before - as a model of domestic abuse. A student artist has painted black eyes, bruises and blood onto the perfect faces of the iconic dolls. Via Dana Hoffman
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Bob Jones University shut down a yearlong investigation into sex abuse complaints before a final report came out. They had really good reasons, we’re sure.
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Dorothy Stratten was the focus of the dreams and ambitions of three men. One killed her. “The major reason that I’m … that we’re both sittin’ here,” says Hefner, “that I wanted to talk about it, is because there is still a great tendency … for this thing to fall into the classic cliché of ‘smalltown girl comes to Playboy, comes to Hollywood, life in the fast lane,’ and that was somehow related to her death. And that is not what really happened. A very sick guy saw his meal ticket and his connection to power, whatever, slipping away. And it was that that made him kill her.”
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Dylan Farrow, Woody Allen’s adoptive daughter, speaks out about her experience. For as long as I could remember, my father had been doing things to me that I didn’t like. I didn’t like how often he would take me away from my mom, siblings and friends to be alone with him. I didn’t like it when he would stick his thumb in my mouth. I didn’t like it when I had to get in bed with him under the sheets when he was in his underwear. I didn’t like it when he would place his head in my naked lap and breathe in and breathe out. I would hide under beds or lock myself in the bathroom to avoid these encounters, but he always found me. These things happened so often, so routinely, so skillfully hidden from a mother that would have protected me had she known, that I thought it was normal. I thought this was how fathers doted on their daughters. But what he did to me in the attic felt different. I couldn’t keep the secret anymore.
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Whatever you already know about this tangled and painful situation, you’ve only heard half: the case against Mia Farrow. This is the other half and it isn’t any prettier. It concerns Woody Allen’s behavior and what it has done to Mia Farrow and the 11 children involved. The author breaks new ground on one of the year’s most shocking stories.
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When you’re depressed, anxious, abused, and/or have been isolated your whole life, it’s easy to feel like other people can’t really ever get close. Socializing is really hard for people who’ve had nothing but abuse. And we keep waiting for someone healthy to save us. But they can’t. So how can we fight this process and end the cycle? Well, there are three options that I’ve seen.
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In India, a woman is sexually assaulted every three minutes and raped every 20 minutes. However, many Indian women are afraid to speak up, fearing retribution from the very same monsters who abused them, and harsh judgement from an insensitive society.
A recent short film by Pooja Batura that’s making waves around the internet is telling them to do exactly the opposite. The film is simply titled “Bol” and captures the different kinds of sexual abuse an Indian woman suffers from during her lifetime, from child abuse to work place harassment to marital rape. The message is clear and simple, “The more you talk, the less it will happen.”
Via Cindy Sullivan
Arlene Drake's curator insight,
January 26, 2014 7:18 PM
This is an Outrage! Speak up for yourself, or Advocate for those who Can't!!
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For President Obama, combating sexual assault in the U.S., particularly in college communities, isn’t just part of his job as president. It’s also one of his top priorities as a dad.
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Curated by Deanna Dahlsad
An opinionated woman obsessed with objects, entertained by ephemera, intrigued by researching, fascinated by culture & addicted to writing. The wind says my name; doesn't put an @ in front of it, so maybe you don't notice. http://www.kitsch-slapped.com
Other Topics
A Marketing Mix
Adventures in advertising and marketing - the contemporary, the historical, and the hysterical. http://deanna.dahlsad.com/
Antiques & Vintage Collectibles
Collecting old things; heirlooms and new to you things! Companion to http://www.inherited-values.com/
Colorful Prism Of Racism
Racism past and present. Companion to http://www.kitsch-slapped.com/category/colorful-prism-of-racism/
Consumption Junction
Consumerism meets marketing; who & what manipulates the free market of goods & services. See also: http://www.kitsch-slapped.com/category/ze-big-mouth-promotions-stuff/
Crimes Against Humanity
From lone gunmen on hills to mass movements. Depressing as hell, really.
Cultural History
The roots of culture; history and pre-history.
Dare To Be A Feminist
For Art's Sake-1
Art, crafts, and the people who make them. To inspire and purchase. Companion to http://www.ululating-undulating-ungulate.com/
Herstory
History as this woman sees it. The serious, the kitsch, the opinionated. Companion to http://www.kitsch-slapped.com/
In The Name Of God
Mainly acts done in the name of religion, but also discussions of atheism, faith, & spirituality.
Kinsanity
Let's just say I have reasons to learn more about mental health, special needs children, psychology, and the like.
Kitsch
Mostly vintage and retro "badness" but you can decide how delicious it is. http://www.kitschy-kitschy-coo.com/blog/
Nerdy Needs
The stuff of nerdy, geeky, dreams.
Readin', 'Ritin', and (Publishing) 'Rithmetic
The meaning behind the math of the bottom line in publishing and the media. For writers, publishers, and bloggers (which are a combination of the two).
Sex Positive
Sexuality as a human right.
Vintage Living Today For A Future Tomorrow
It's as easy to romanticize the past as it is to demonize it; instead, let's learn from it. More than living simply, more than living 'green', thrifty grandmas knew the importance of the 'economics' in Home Economics. The history of home ec, lessons in thrift, practical tips and ideas from the past focused on sustainability for families and out planet. Companion to http://www.thingsyourgrandmotherknew.com/
Visiting The Past
Travel based on grande ideas, locations, and persons of the past.
Walking On Sunshine
Stuff that makes me smile.
You Call It Obsession & Obscure; I Call It Research & Important
Links to (many of) my columns and articles.
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